I'm Anyone

"Be serious! Be alert! Your adversary the Devil is prowling around like a roaring lion, looking for anyone he can devour." 1 Peter 5:8

Guess what?! I'm anyone...

At the beginning of the year I posed the question will this be the one? I found myself at a standstill in my relationship with God. I prayed that this new year would ultimately bring me to a new level in my relationship with Christ.

Unfortunately, the last several weeks have been one blow after another. I feel like I'm under attack, and I'm exhausted! It has come from all different directions... emotionally, mentally, financially, socially, physically... and it repeats itself a few times. 

Despite my struggle to not let anyone know details of my life and my extreme fear of being vulnerable, here I am writing and sharing my sadness and discouragement with my readers... but more importantly declaring the devil will not win!


What am I doing???

Distress causes me a lot of problems with eating and sleeping. Whether it's from God or Satan, when I'm awakened at 4 a.m. I instantly start praying. I pray that God takes the pain from me, but if He doesn't that it's used to make me more like Him. I pray for whoever is on my mind when I immediately awake hoping that they allow God to meet their need. If my mind still refuses rest, I get up and spend the next few hours reading and writing and praying. I can testify that it has helped me to be extra prepared for the battles of the day.

"God don't let my pain be wasted. Use it to conform me to your image."

Ironically (okay not ironically but by grand design), I have been doing a Bible study by Linda Dillow called "Calm My Anxious Heart." Let go of my worry and fear... how?! Find contentment in my circumstances... are you serious?!

It's a daily struggle, especially with Satan's persistence, to practice what I am learning. I have typed important scriptures and reminders in my phone from these lessons. Every time I become overwhelmed with circumstances, I read the notes and remind myself to be content in any situation, to focus on the positives, and that I am fearfully and wonderfully made.

In my latest blog 'one breath at a time', I talked about trying to just get through the day. I may start the day ready to conquer Satan's darts but halfway through I begin to falter. The only thing I can do during this time of battle is to take one step at a time... "Lord am I in Your will now?"

Another coincidence (not) is that the UCB Word for Today has been publishing a series this week on winning your personal war with Satan using the following outline:
     - Be self-controlled and alert. 1 Peter 5:8
     - Submit yourselves to God. James 4:7
     - Resist the devil... he will flee from you. James 4:7
     - Come near to God and He will come near to you. James 4:8
     - Wash your hands, you sinners. James 4:8


My number one defense against Satan is to immerse myself in my Lord. While I'm afriad of what might happen next, I fight for the hope. The hope is found in the thoughts the Lord has toward me for peace, not evil (Jeremiah 29:11).

I have a scripture on my wall as I walk out the front door that says, "Be not afraid not dismayed by reason of this great multitude; for the battle is not yours, but God's" 2 Chronicles 20:15. It is my reminder that today's battle is not mine to fight and control. Because He is Lord of my life, He will fight the battle. Today's battle is just a small one in the war between God and Satan... And I know who wins the war!

"But when the darkness of dismay comes, endure until it is over, because out of it will come the ability to follow Jesus truly, which brings inexpressibly wonderful joy."

 

One Breath at a Time

The theme of the day... one breath at a time.

A very close friend of mine returned to work this week after her dream of becoming a mother finally came true. She is heartbroken at the thought of leaving her baby girl with a babysitter, and trying to come to terms that, at least for now, it is not God's plan for her be a stay at home mom. Because I'm not a mother, I can only imagine the pain she must be feeling.

I noticed someone make a comment to her "Take it one day at a time, some days are as little as one breath at a time." And I began thinking...

How many times have I heard someone say 'I just want to know God's plan for my life.' We all want a divine revelation about what the future holds so that we know the exact step we should take next in order to get there. And following this expression of frustration, I've often given the advice to be in God's will today. If you are in His will today; you will move on into His will tomorrow; and before you know it you will be smack in the middle of God's plan for your life.

I believe this is exactly what my new momma friend sought to accomplish. She and her husband sought the Lord's will to become parents for years. Unable to conceive a child they began praying and searching for His divine plan. There's no doubt it was a daily search. And that daily seeking of Him brought them straight into His plan... adopting Baby BB.

However, this concept of one breath at a time, struck a chord. I am beyond overwhelmed with my job this week. My brain is running at warp speed. (I think my superpower is having the brain activity of two or three people!)

In the UCB's Word for Today, the author talks about praying for God's will every two or three minutes. This brings reality to "pray without ceasing" (1 Thess. 5:17). The prayers that can be whispered to God any where, any time, are the ones that get us through the tough days. And they not only keep us in His will from day to day, but from moment to moment.

I remember a time in my life that my conversations with God were constant; and I want to return there. While I'm attempting to hurry through the line at the grocery store, I can thank Him for the ability to buy those comfort foods! As I'm sitting in a difficult meeting, I can ask God to let my words speak grace and mercy to both those easy and those difficult in the room.

As life overwhelms me, I am challenged with this new concept to not only be in His will today, but to be in His will this moment. "Some days are as little as one breath at a time..."